Discipline

Self-discipline is one of those traits a work-at-home mom really needs.
People often ask me how I muster the discipline of getting down to business instead of paying endless phone calls to friends, watching tv during the day and Lord knows what else.
The funny thing is that my problem with discipline is altogether a different one, as I find it difficult NOT to work.
In order to achieve a better work/balance I have stopped working on Wednesdays -although I do the admin on that day-and try to steer clear from my home office at least one of the days of the weekend. Indeed, countless studies have shown that home workers spend more time working, not less.
Yesterday I did not work. I did not even update this blog. I spent time with Lara and Julie, two-year old twins. They are such fun, they are so cute. It's really difficult to become mad at them, even when they are tearing down the house. I also spent time with the apple of my eye, aka Thomas, we worked on his homework together. After a period of huge indifference with regard to school matters, he is now taking things a lot more seriously (thankfully), it's sweet to see the efforts he makes.
Come to think of it...I did work, but it was only one hour of interpreting at a civil-law notary's office. The Dutch law stipulates that when foreigners buy a property in the Netherlands, an interpreter must be present to translate the deed. This makes sense, as otherwise they might not know what they are getting into and a mortgage has far-reaching consequences.
Anyway, I really had to force myself to stay away from the computer, in the evening too, and enjoy time off.
"Nobody said on their deathbed: 'I wish I had spent more time in the office'", this quote, often mentioned in management books, is one I have to keep in mind, as it also applies to the home office...

The small business blues

In my study (which, I know, I should call 'home office') I keep a diary about being a mom and the owner of a small business. My life has been so hectic and chaotic lately that the diary ended up at the bottom of a stack of documents.

Yesterday, my accountant rang, urging me to do something about the VAT-admin (deadline: 30 January!). I am late, as ever. So I spent considerable time checking all the invoices, receipts and other financial stuff from the last three months. Nothing to write home about. One of the advantages was, however, that I combined this particular chore with tidying up my study. The diary turned up again. Depressingly enough the last entry (November 07) was about my financial 'mismanagement'. Sometimes it seems as if we're stuck, unable to change.

In a book on Time Management I found a quote that was eerily appropriate:
'If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you always got.'

Indeed!

But I also read somewhere that it's possible to make a fresh start every day, I'll try to keep it in mind.

On writing, escapism, chaos, being a mother

One of the many things I enjoy about writing is the fact that you are able to travel to other worlds without leaving the comfort of your home (well, the degree of comfort of my home is debatable, but that's another issue). It's sheer escapism in a sense and very comparable to reading or enjoying a good movie. At the moment I'm working on several modest writing projects: for one of those, I imagine living on one of the Aran Islands. Nothing could be further from the truth, as I live in the urban jungle of The Hague, the Netherlands, but it is definitely enjoyable to image another life, lived in a stone cottage with a thatched roof, amongst green fields and near the ocean. The Internet has made it so easy to find information on places you've never been to yourself, it's amazing. Although I must say...I am becoming so interested in the island of Inis Meain that I probably will travel there in the not too distant future.

For another project I get to imagine being a small boy (which, again, requires the necessary imagination, as I am a woman, and forty years old at that) for some parts and an old bum for others (another leap of the imagination).

The other perk of writing is that you set your own hours (which, as a mom, is an invaluable advantage!) and that the investment requirements are very limited. A notepad and a pen. A computer. A few dictionaries and grammar books.

To-day I am not writing anything, I am being lazy. There is a huge amount of tidying up to do as chaos is thriving in my home. But what the heck, to-day is for relaxing and for reading. I am reading 'The stress-free home' by Jackie Craven. A nice book. Inspiring, well-written and with good pictures. I am figuring, I will probably never be stress-free, but perhaps I can get started on making my home stress-free...

Chaos

The chaos on my desk equals the chaos in my head.

Sometimes I feel kind of overwhelmed, if truth be told. There are so many messages to answer, books to read, things to do, documents to translate and people to see that I skip cleaning house (well, not entirely, but almost...), keep cooking extremely basic and forget about tidying up my desk, as the picture above is bound to demonstrate.

Anyway, I guess that, in a not too distant future, I will have time and energy for tidying up my desk. But for now I intend to be a couch potato.

Thomas is playing with his friend Sybren and I tend to make the most of that kind of opportunity. Seize the day, as Saul Bellow would say. Capture the moment, more like it, in WAHM-terms. Anyhow, I'm off...

Being in business, staying in business

If you surf the web, you can find all kinds of free information on starting a business. It's great to have all that free info available at the click of a mouse.

Surprisingly enough, there is much less info about staying in business. How do you make sure you thrive?

There are two tricks of the trade I'd like to share with you:

1) Love your customers:
Many WAHMS choose to build their business gradually over time and to keep their business relatively small (making it easier to combine with motherhood). This offers the opportunity for a personal and customized approach. I don't like my customers, I love them. I am interested in providing them with a good service, but that's not where my interest ends. I am also truly interested in how their careers are developing, what they consider important, how they are doing at a more personal level. It makes my work more pleasant and has turned out to be a business tool as well.

2) Always, always overdeliver:
I've read this piece of advice in a Dutch book on working from home ['Handboek Succesvol Thuiswerken, Edith Hagenaar] and I've taken it to heart. I always try to deliver my work way before the deadline - to the extent possible within my line of work, as the deadlines tend to be very short-and to walk an extra mile. Doing a little extra feels good and is remembered, believe me.

What about you lot, any advice on staying in business?

Thomas and the twins

On Wednesdays we often receive the visit of two lovely twins: Lara and Julie.

They are two years old and extremely cute, which makes it difficult to get mad at them, even when they are being naughty.

Thomas is very sweet to them. It always amazes me how tiring it can be to hang around small children ("One hour with a child is like a ten-mile run, I read somewhere), and how enjoyable at the same time. What also strikes me, time and again, is how different I feel after spending quite some time with small kids (exhausted, but that type of exhaustion is easily solved by a good night's sleep) and after marathon translating sessions (exhausted, but no amount of sleep seems to help).

A writer's tools

A writer's tools (non-exhaustive list):

*Imagination
* Life experience
* Memory
* Sensitivity
* the Internet
* A camera
* A note pad and pen
* A computer
* The 5 senses
* Books (novels, dictionaries, grammar books, you name it)

Anyone any advice on other things a writer can put to proper use?

Quote

As I am in a bit of a hurry, to-day's blog is limited to a quote:

"Wow! I get to give birth and change diapers!"

It's on a notepad I bought from Chronicle Books, who also published 'Another day in paradise' by Anne Taintor inc, see the photo on the right.

Fun stuff.

Upside down

As a WAHM you don't always work conventional hours. Although I am a strong believer in having some kind of schedule as a guideline, with set working days and hours, to help establish boundaries between your professional life and your personal life...in practice things do not always go according to plan.

This Monday is a case in point. For the first time in weeks there was no deadline looming and I intended to work on answering the email messages that have been piling up in my inbox and do some admin. Admittedly not a very exciting prospect, but I looked forward to having the time to do it while Thomas was at school.

But yesterday evening I first watched 'Messiah' on BBC, then read for a long while and then found I could not get to sleep at all. At one o'clock in the morning I was still wide awake. When I was finally becoming somewhat drowsy, around two in the morning, I suddenly had an idea for a story I am working on. As experience has shown that these ideas tend to vanish overnight if I don't write them down I got out of bed and enjoyed a few hours at my desk till the crack of dawn. Then slept an hour or two, had breakfast with Thomas and then got back into bed, only to wake up at lunch time. Bye shedule, bye admin, by empty inbox.

But what the heck, there is always to-morrow...

Detectives

One of the problems of working from home is that boundaries between one's professional life and one's private life tend to become blurred. Whenever I have an assignment outside the home (as an interpreter, in my case) I relish the feeling I have when I return home and feel the working day is done and I am 'allowed' to enjoy my spare time.
Strangely enough it is quite difficult to allow yourself spare time when you know the work is piling up on your desk, even if you have been working like a maniac.
Anyhow, I am trying to mend my evil ways and have stopped working in the weekends and evenings, unless there is absolutely no other option.

In the weekends I enjoy spending some time reading and watching telly (admittedly not the most exciting leisure activities, but still...), and I particularly like watching detective series, like Dalziel and Pascoe, Inspector Lynley and the like.

Some research has been carried out in the matter and it turns out that people suffering from anxiety and depression often benefit from reading detective stories or watching detective series. That's probably because it is a safe way of confronting one's fears. I am lucky this weekend, yesterday I enjoyed a new Dutch series called Deadline (which reminds me of my legal translation work, but what the heck) and the Swedish Wallander and this evening I'll be enjoying the BBC's Messiah.

Business and diapers

www.businessanddiapers.blogspot.com

You might think the title is a bit strange, I mean, business and diapers?
In their book on working from home, Patricia Cobe and Ellen Parlapiano aptly describe work as a mompreneur: "you are both chief diaper changer and CEO". That's what made me choose this title.

Now my son is already ten, so the diaper changing days are well and truly over...But I still relish the variety life as a WAHM brings. I deal with deadlines and with play dates, with homework and turnover figures, with business proposals and the new Harry Potter, sleepovers and admin. And I wouldn't have it any other way!

New blog

This is my new English blog about the reality of being a work from home mum.